i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
