im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Randomize
