She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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