playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
This baby is an asshole
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
