I wish i was in the wii world.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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