when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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