i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize