Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
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