yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Randomize
