Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
wow bdsm is so cute
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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