I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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