she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
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For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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