Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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