belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
