i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Come see our sink grown plant.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
