you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
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So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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