That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize