And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
