if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
