i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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