I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
