Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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