Have you finally orgasmed yet?
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
