He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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