bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize