The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
