Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
