I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
