help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Just cropdusted the office
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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