It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
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