Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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