I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Randomize
