Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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