are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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