Well apparently he's into motor boating.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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