I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
