Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
