And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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