I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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