We got so high we made milksteak
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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