when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
