Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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