I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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