Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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