I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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