oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize