So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
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