wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.