i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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