sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Randomize
