My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
